Apparently, you should always build on what you have, as soon as you can. Otherwise the resolve may slip away and you’ll be left at square one without any hope. Or maybe not, but I think I would be.
For that reason, I’ve spent the day working out a few little things that will ‘reward’ me for working hard and being more organised. Here’s the main one!
Learn to eat again
It may seem obvious, but eating is good for us. It’s our friend, and if you’ve read this blog over the past couple of years, you’ll know that it’s also my obsession. Sadly it’s also the first thing that goes when something emotional happens.
Today I have been learning to eat again. Beans with cheese on top of toast, with a poached egg on the side, and a tiny, homemade, organic pickled beetroot was the first thing I tried today, after 48 hours of eating no more than half a melon.
I admit, I’ve had no lunch, but I picked up some fruit and veggies, and knocked out a carrot and orange juice this afternoon (messy-looking picture below).
The final effort today, won’t really be much of an effort since I bought a bottle of Grossman’s Korma sauce, on the grounds that I can’t make a curry sauce for £1.
Just a happy addition of raw king prawns and any likely looking veggies I have hanging around, some rice, maybe some mushroom bhaji, and some cachumba, and I will be a pretty full girl in about an hour’s time.
I’m not up to the emotional space of full-scale cooking mess, but I think I can manage a gentle curry with rice.
Why eating is good for you
Eating doesn’t just feed your body; it feeds your soul. That’s one of the reasons I stop when I get upset, because initially I feed my soul through the creativity of the food production process, and when upset, all creativity gets poured into the maelstrom of pain instead of into something external.
Filling my body with vitamins, healthy food, and real sustenance (or as close to that as I can get) is part of the healing process, and I think I know how well I am when I look objectively at my eating habits (how often, how regularly, what, and how much). Today I’m more well than I’ve been for a long time. Possibly over a year, although time will tell.
I think it may be curry time!